Mustafa Abbas Zain, HBsc (c)
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Neurodivergence is an incredibly vast and diverse subject; it’s more of an umbrella term that covers multiple experiences that are subdivided by specific diagnostic classifications. Perhaps this holistic approach actively challenges conventional thought on the origins of neuro-developmental “disorders” and their overlapping characteristics.The idea centrally revolves around the mutual co-existence of different symptoms in varying degrees (Clouder et al., 2020). While the concept of neurodiversity has been widely discussed in detail in earlier chapters of this book, it is important to mention how these ideas materialized and surfaced. In this chapter, I will reflect on my experiences as a neurodivergent individual who is incidentally an immigrant and a mature student, including navigating diagnosis, treatment, and barriers within a well-renowned post-secondary institution.

As a person with lived experience with neurodivergence, looking at it from a medical or diagnostic standpoint can seriously overlook how it affects a person. The word “divergence” means difference and cannot be reduced to a universal set of symptoms. To further this, the concept of neurodiversity focuses on accepting greater intersectionality within various disorders such as ADHD, Autistic Spectrum Disorder , Asperger's Syndrome, and Tourette's Syndrome. The idea behind the diagnostic modalities relies on only treating symptoms. More specifically, Dr. Gabor Mate provides a discussion on ADHD/ADD to discuss beyond the genetic and biological factors of the disorder itself. Instead, he focuses on socio-economic factors, which later get molded as a behavioral response to life situations that stem from early childhood development and environmental factors (Mate, 2021). Further, Dr. Mate details each individual's innate bio-physiological predispositions, which are shaped by a child's ability to respond to certain stimuli on a threshold that may be higher or lower compared to other neurotypical peers (Mate, 2021). He also notes that early childhood trauma heavily influences the ability to respond and develop habits that could alleviate the impacts.

Understanding Co-morbidities, and Reflecting on Social Identity and Navigating Diagnosis, Treatment
Understanding the neurodivergent experience can be difficult as there are a multitude of accessibility barriers, in addition to having ‘comorbidities’ or multple coexisting conditions. It is first important to define co-morbidities in the context of neurodivergence. In addition to having one disease/disorder, such as ADHD, many individuals may also have multiple coexisting diseases (Valderas et al., 2009). One of the issues with having several concurrent diseases/conditions/disorders simultaneously is that there is limited research and understanding of how people with comorbidities view their illnesses. However, understanding the morbidity burden is essential, which assesses the impact and severity for the person with multiple existing conditions (Valderas et al., 2009). These burdens are influenced by socioeconomic, cultural, and environmental factors (Valderas et al., 2009). In terms of my journey with neurodivergence and other coexisting conditions, one factor I have noticed is the lack of cultural relevance/competency by healthcare and education professionals. Further, I have experienced a consistent lack of understanding of the severity of the different conditions, and medical providers lack the patient experience, and the cultural values of the patient themselves.

Journeying into Post-Secondary Education
My first attempt at seeking a diagnosis for my learning challenges began with a conversation with the administrative staff at the Toronto Adult Learning Center (ALC); this experience was rooted in the dismissal and gaslighting of my experiences. The adult learning center was situated in a low-income, refugee-populated area. Having my concerns invalidated was a shock, as I expected staff to have better empathy and understanding of immigrants and BIPOC health. While this experience was disheartening as a recent immigrant, and to have traumatic experiences within, I decided it was best to continue my courses at the adult learning center so that I could reach my goal of getting accepted into a post-secondary education.
Within a month of completing the pre-requisite course at the ALC, I was admitted to one of the leading universities in Canada, where I felt genuinely welcomed and grateful that my prior education, and life experiences were considered to provide me with an offer-of-admission. I was overly ambitious and thought I was secure in understanding my academic interests and future goals. I decided upon courses and enrolled myself part-time, which would allow me greater flexibility with my accessibility needs for being neurodivergent and an immigrant with various cultural and family responsibilities.
As I was progressing through my first semester, I began noticing challenges that impacted my ability to provide quality sufficient academic output. I was overstaying lengthy hours at the library following classes, reading course material on the bus, and re-reading assignments on my way to work. My grades remained low, and grasping material was very challenging. I tried different techniques and began engaging with my professors and course teaching assistants (TAs); I went to office hours and extra writing sessions run by an academic writing center. It was exhausting to know the effort I was putting in compared to the reality of my grades and ability to complete work. Nevertheless, I chose not to give up because I had to come very far in my life to get the opportunity to study at this top institution. It wasn't until one of the course TAs shared their similar experience of being a BIPOC student with multiple neurodevelopmental disabilities that they recommended I reach out to the school’s department of accessibility.

While trying to deal with the burden of enrolling in accessibility services, I managed work, family, and school to the best of my ability, but things became more overwhelming. I was consistently late to classes, began making careless mistakes within my assignments, and managing time and appointments was extremely difficult. I lived a disordered life that went undiagnosed for so long that it was difficult for me to recognize that it wasn't just a matter of me “not trying hard enough”.
Upon finally making the appointment with accessibility services to receive academic accommodations, I was provided with a stack of papers that needed to be filled by a qualified healthcare professional. These papers included a “certificate of disability”, which highlights what conditions/disabilities you have that limit your academic functioning. As a newcomer to Canada, getting acquainted with life was a difficult transition. I was unaware I needed a family doctor, one who could have filled out the necessary forms. Given that I didn't have a family doctor, I decided to walk to a nearby walk-in clinic to fill out the accessibility forms. Given that I didn't have a family doctor, I decided to walk to a nearby walk-in clinic to fill out the accessibility forms. Unfortunately, the physician refused to fill the forms and claimed it would be too much of a liability. This process was tremendously frustrating that I decided to give up on the academic accommodations for the rest of the year as the tasks associated were not without barriers. My academic and learning struggle only worsened after my choice not to move forward with filling out the necessary paperwork to get accommodations. A major barrier to getting diagnosed with neurodevelopmental disorders as an adult is that it’s extremely expensive.

I decided that I could not continue my post-secondary education without assistance from the university accessibility services, as my diagnosis with ADHD and other comorbidities were having a significant impact on my academic abilities. The academic advisor that I was assigned to was one of the most understanding people I had communicated with throughout my educational journey. The advisor was empathic and supportive of me processing the initial diagnosis. Further as I previously mentioned, getting tested for neurodevelopmental disorders as an adult is costly, and she ensured that I was able to attain funding for me to complete psychoeducation assessments to diagnose my neurodevelopmental disorders.
Academic Accommodations, and Systemic Barriers in Post-Secondary Education
Initially the academic accommodations were helpful in supporting my academic needs as a result of my many co-existing conditions. As a social sciences and humanities student going through the higher education system, managing treatment, having full-time employment, and managing academics, is tremendously difficult. Moreover, my experience with the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic and the transition to virtual learning, and support was highly inaccessible. It should be noted that the current educational system in a broader context is not well designed to support the needs of mature students, nor mature students with various disabilities. As a neurodivergent student in an inaccessible system is incredibly debilitating and hinders my growth as an aspiring professional.

Completing accommodation requests is a laborious administrative process. You have to prepare the list of all courses with their specific deadlines, which includes formulating specific course guidelines, following up, and writing down each particular test date and assignment date where you may be able to request accommodation/follow up with professors. These tasks multiply when you’re a student with accessibility needs; this is an additional burden on the actual learning process as it requires time to learn the material, complete the corresponding assignments, and seek office hours to seek clarity on course assignments from professors. Naturally, this often becomes an overwhelming process where multiple timelines are close by with equal importance. The trauma response of flight or freeze can activate, depriving one of valuable time and resources. Symptoms such as time blindness, task paralysis, and added anxiety all drain the neurodivergent mind. All this energy, if saved, could be allocated to other parts of academic learning. The responsibility of action, timelines, and accuracy are burdened upon the same student requesting support in the same things they may not be able to do similarly as their neurotypical peers. who may have been much more comfortable being able to work through such processes. While support is present but, I find the model obsolete. The technological barriers can often become a timesink where you have to spend countless hours configuring minute details like learning to navigate the library website and successfully cite academic references.

Based upon my own experience with the accessibility services at the university, its evident that their working model is best for supporting students who have been diagnosed earlier in life, and those that have more extensive social supports Neurodivergence is something that should be embraced for the strengths it holds, but also recognize the barriers to everyday life. Finding support to navigate through the education systems have continuously exposed me to various barriers that have impeded on my abilities to thrive.
Receiving a diagnosis later in life is frustrating as you have to address many of the struggles, strengths, and ultimately learning to manage on your own for the first time. Whereas, my peers with an early diagnosis had access to individualized attention from the elementary school level; having an Individualized Educational Plan (IEP), as narrated, helped them navigate academic overwhelm with more support. An early diagnosis with a neurodevelopmental disorder would mean that they would have had higher exposure to coaching, therapy, and other supports to assist in guiding their life choices in their trajectories to post-secondary education.

The current accessibility system continues to rely on archaic infrastructure (eg. reductionist treatment models) than genuine acceptance, inclusion, and equity is less likely to be attained. Regardless of age of diagnosis, many of my peers who are neurodivergent note similar struggles. This itself is indicative that innovative and inclusive solutions need to continually be developed to meet the diverse needs of students with neurodivergence. One issue that many only understand is ADHD as a neurological disorder, and they only highlight the symptoms of ADHD. Developing a refined view of ADHD requires education systems to put more effort into understanding how individual ADHD manifests and how individual capacity and responsibility to manage the disorder are highly diverse in individuals. (Nadeau, 2016).

Based upon my experience in higher education has allowed me to realize that I should not have to mask who I am as a neurodivergent person, immigrant, and mature student to fit the norms of society. The act of masking itself is a trauma response which neurodivergent people have to indulge to blend in.The act of masking can be defined as behaving in ways that appear normal as a means of socializing and being accepted within society. Seeking accommodations are on a need-to know basis as there are certain risks involved with seeking support. Once things are documented, due to the level of stigma that exists in society, there can be repercussions or discrimination within the workplace or education system for people who are neurodivergent or have invisible disabilities. Society needs to work towards becoming a society that is both trauma and culturally informed.

It can be almost traumatizing to individuals with neurodivergence or invisible disabilities when language is non-inclusive, nor trauma/culture-informed. For example, the simple way we phrase ‘impairment’ in relation to neurodivergence can be harmful, as it shouldn’t only be addressed from this lens; it should recognize its variability in each individual. As stigma exists, and being able to provide authentic inclusion based on compassion and understanding is what is necessary for supporting the diverse needs of individuals. Lastly, those with neurodivergence have incredible strengths that are of tremendous value in education systems, labor-force and the broader context of society.
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References
Clouder, Karakus, M., Cinotti, A., Ferreyra, M. V., Fierros, G. A., & Rojo, P. (2020). Neurodiversity in higher education: a narrative synthesis. Higher Education, 80(4), 757–778. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10734-020-00513-6
Mate. G (2021, August 18). AD(H)D. Retrieved from https://drgabormate.com/adhd/

Valderas, J. M., Starfield, B., Sibbald, B., Salisbury, C., & Roland, M. (2009). Defining
Comorbidity: Implications for Understanding Health and Health Services. Annals of Family Medicine, 7(4), 357–363. https://doi.org/10.1370/afm.983

Nadeau, K. G. (2016). The ADHD guide to career success : harness your strengths,
manage your challenges (2nd ed.). Routledge.doi.org/10.4324/9781315723334